Real Personality
by seductive insanity
Summary: Because when Naruto tries and sort of fails to be a total twilight saga fan. Hinata burst into very colorful words. AU-ish/Crack-ish


Real Personality

"_Hiding your true self practically just screams out "I have problems"_

-_That bizarre neighbor the stalks my neighbor's cat_

* * *

One-shot

**-In our own very alternate and crack-ish universe**

* * *

Everybody could feel the atmosphere getting more and more tense, glancing every now and then to the two parties.

In one party, a lone wolf stands, and his name is Naruto the most idiotic stupid, knuckled headed man, dense and most of all joyful man in this whole crack-ish universe.

Naruto stared intently to the lavender eyed beauty, eyes focusing to her and only her. I mean I for all would clearly see them as a couple but seeing as how emotionally constipated I am I have an excuse, because who in the hell's name could not read this atmosphere must have issues. Anyways back to the second party.

In the second party a violet haired girl smiled innocently. Yeah, that's our good ol'Hinata. But even I know that Hinata staring like that means no good. I mean you could easily tell she is infuriated.

Obviously.

Let us replay the highlights of the breakout.

* * *

Ready. Pause. Replay.

* * *

The loudmouth walked towards his homeroom, proud of this awesome feeling of contentedness. A grin stretched across his face as he saw his favorite Hyuuga.

"Hinata-chan!"

The said girl looked up; a smile graced her lips, looking at her crush.

"Ohayo Gozaimas, Naruto-kun"

She waved at the man, and quickly resumed to her book, but Naruto thought otherwise as he took a seat beside her and started touching her hair.

"Whatcha readin', Hina-chan?"

The girl blushed at the familiar name. Memories flooded her mind as she got redder and redder. As she remembered she was talking to Naruto, she let out a quick-

"Nani?"

"Ano, Whatcha readin?"

She smiled.

"Twilight"

He understood her hastiness to read that book. It was a really good book. He stayed silent, noticing the air was nothing but air nothing filled it only gossip form the other tables. He sighed.

As a Hyuuga, Hinata sensed his bored-ness so she wanting to be polite quickly asked what he needed.

"Ne, Naruto-kun what is it?"

He scratched his head animatedly; completely unaware of Hinata's eagerness to read her book.

"Wasn't that book from Stephen Meyer?"

The girl he was talking to gave off an annoyed aura, oblivious from the Blondie.

"You want to know what happened."

"Ano, not really."

"She chooses Edward"

The innocent girl twitched awkwardly obviously mad at the spoiler, even though she looked completely calm and composed she was really freaking out.

'Maybe counting would help.'

And with that she began the countdown.

10…

"They also had a child"

9…

"Her nickname is Nessie, from y'know the Lockness monster"

8…

"Jacob was the one that gave her the nick name"

7…

"I meant for the child"

6…

"Jacob has a humongous crush on Bella too"

5…

"It was so awkward"

4…

"Bella turned into a vampire"

3…

"By Edward of course"

2…

"While giving birth too!"

1...

"To Nessie-"

He was kindly interrupted by a scream. The confused boy stared at the girl who screamed only to see as red as a tomato.

"Did you just-"

Naruto was gladly interrupted again by not a scream but a word. A very colorful one too.

"-ck. You asshole, you motherfucking spiolee. I just bought the whole shitting series. Bitch you know how much I wanted to read this, fucker. I hate shitting Twilight now!"

The girl practically screamed it out with equally gleaming, furious eyes.

Now what will happen? Let's head back to the future.

* * *

Pause. Forward. Play.

* * *

The boy stared long and hard. Gazing deeply to the endless pools of white, everybody's eyes lingering in them.

"Whoa, Hinata-chan?"

"Oh, puh-lease, don't Hinata-chan me-"

"Ano, Hina-"

"- trying to interrupt my rage."

"Um, Hinata-chan?"

"What Naruto, what?"

"Kakashi is right behind you!"

"Nani!"

She looked behind her to see her amused teacher waiting patiently.

'This cannot be happening.'

She dropped her head.

"I'll be seeing both of you in detention!"

And with that she practically died. She looked at Naruto, a smile on his lips.

"Maybe it won't be so bad after all."

* * *

.-x

* * *

The orange clad boy sat right in front of Hinata. He looked at the girl apolitically.

"Ano, Hinata-chan the reason why I did that was because…"

She looked up, with a smile graced on her lips.

"You're forgiven."

The said boy smiled sheepishly. He looked at her, as she smiled with her eyes closed. He thought this was the chance he had. He reached in and kissed her. The girl looked like in total shocked but melted in his embrace, her heart beating.

She really did like Twilight.

* * *

And they lived happily ever after.

* * *

A/N: Read and Review. Don't own Naruto


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